I gave you two days to write it down – what you miss about yourself, what you wish you could get back. Did you? I’ll be honest, I didn’t get the time. Or, did I not make the time? Either way, I did give it some thought.
I miss being in charge, as I was when I was chairperson of a university committee. I miss being involved, running between class and work and sports and friends, rarely sleeping. I miss being dynamic, having the confidence to talk to 300 students, or to stand up in a meeting. I miss having no routine, simply living, at whatever time of day. I miss the social gatherings around the lunch table, or afternoon coffees when we’re supposed to be studying, or squeezing 10 people into a dorm room to sit and chat after a long day.
I miss England, trying to explain South-African foods like Bobotie and Potjiekos to the English, Welsh, Scottish, Irish, Dutch and whoever else came to Jabula. I miss the cold, the heater inside, the slow people in Morrissons, the taxi rides, the travels by train, the days out in Liverpool and Chester. But it was there, in England, that I lost myself…the self I used to know.
We become lost in change. We lose ourselves in change. Think about that. I will explain tomorrow!